“It feels like me taking ownership of things that have happened to me.”

‘STEPS’ is Sarah Meth’s beautifully accomplished new EP, releasing this week on Slow Dance Records. The collection is deeply poignant, yet makes room for playfulness, a self-confessed maturation reflecting a willingness to confront what life has thrown at her, and a growing trust in her own musical instincts.

What decided which tracks made it on to this EP?

“I didn’t know what my next project was going to be, but during this time of my life where I was writing a lot, these songs in particular seemed to make sense in my brain. The order of the EP tells a story, I suppose, and reflects my journey of processing assault. The intro, ‘It Happens,’ is pretty abrasive and random….then the rest of the EP is like the impact, going through the different motions and feelings until it finishes with ‘Fucktoy.’ I think the EP finishing with that song means to me that I’ve found a confidence back within myself. I can call things out, I can trust myself. There is no ‘end goal’ of what recovering from these experiences looks like, I think… it’s all about the steps along the way – hence the EP title.” 

There is a real immediacy to a lot of the tracks here, most coming in around the 2-minute mark, finishing once they have introduced a couple of ideas. What decides that a track is finished and ready to include on a record?

“I like to create space within songs, I am a firm believer in not waffling in songwriting. Probably because I waffle a lot in person. When people are like, “You should throw in an extra verse or you could cut that one down,” I’m like …. “but then it wouldn’t tell the story.” The story could be 4 lines, but as soon as it starts being catered around something else, it’s stops being my story. I think the biggest deciding factor has to just be how it feels to me. Does it lyrically, sonically and emotionally give everything I want to come across? Then it’s done.

“Also, making short songs and demos means that they can always be reimagined or extended in the future. I love when artists do that. Joni Mitchell wrote ‘Both Sides Now’ at 21, then reworked and released it when she was nearly 60. It’s such a beautiful song and hearing her sing it at those different stages of her career is so moving. Both versions make me cry.” 

You report recording your vocal takes direct into your laptop mic whilst “tucked up in bed.” Was that a means to get a particular sound or more about the symbolism of performing them like that? 

“It’s just how I get in the zone and how I have always made my demos. I think it’s half me being lazy and half me liking the way my voice sounds that way. It’s easier to get into the world of the songs. I’d never really thought about the symbolism… but I’m into that.”

The EP mixes bedroom recording with more polished moments. With access to studio spaces and techniques, what is the appeal of leaving those DIY fingerprints on the recording? 

“I tend not to use an interface or anything when I’m making demos…I like getting the raw idea down. I think when I was younger, I was told and believed that things had to be done “properly” or a certain way. But other people would then say to me they preferred my demos. As I got a bit older and more sure of myself I just decided, who cares how I’m doing it, if the feelings there then it’s there.

“When I’m in a studio it’s different, I get quite overwhelmed with technology and recording bits…even when I play live I worry I’ve plugged the wrong thing in somewhere…but with recording I don’t think that matters as much, because so many amazing things come from happy accidents. I don’t know what I’m doing half the time when I produce but at the same time, I know exactly what I’m doing. It’s weird. I think what I’ve learnt is in order to make something beyond yourself you need both. That’s why working with Louis [O’Bryen] is so great because he gets it but is also persistent when he needs to be about recording things in a way that’s best for the song. I reckon for the album I’ll probably have to use a real mic for most of it.”

Discussing some of the songs, you speak about wanting to “say it with your chest” in the delivery and production. How do pop forms influence the way you have presented the content of this record? How do they allow you to manipulate the meanings behind the lyrics?

“I learnt a lot about myself in writing some of these songs…I think before this project I thought I was only a sad little songstress blah blah blah. But when shit actually hit the fan in my life the natural reaction came through songwriting to make light of these bad experiences, with songs such as ‘Sister You Said’ and ‘Fucktoy.’ Now in hindsight that makes sense to me, as it feels like me taking ownership of things that have happened to me. It’s empowering to feel I’m making my own narrative through creating things….that I am not defined by what has happened to me, but I have grown into a person that has lived through assault and made it out the other side okay. I hope having that tied up in some more upbeat and feel-good songs can help other people feel the same.”

Could you talk me through the significance of the artwork, and specifically what the boxing gloves mean to you.

“The EP being called STEPS has different meanings to it. Walking is often my biggest inspiration for my music because something about moving through my surroundings makes me feel most in touch with myself. I have never really been a pen, paper and desk kind of person. I can’t concentrate for shit sitting down. Anyways, this changed when one of my assaults happened as I was walking home at night. I had to completely rewire my relationship to feeling safe again in my body… it took a few years and it’s fluid, but we’re getting there. When I felt ready again, I would go on daytime walks for hours around my Dad’s house when I lived with him. I remember being on this one walk and thinking to myself how I was so defensive and living in so much fear, it felt like I constantly had these boxing gloves on. I think as a protective thing but also in a way where I felt very closed for a long time. Shooting the video for ‘Steps’ meant so much to me, because I came up with the idea on that walk of doing a video where I take the gloves off and carry on walking. I guess to symbolise making it through and carrying on kind of thing… as soon as I got home from that walk the song was born and it felt like a huge weight had lifted.

“I feel so lucky to have made that idea a reality a few years later with some of my best mates Sal and Milly. A small group of us went and filmed in Malvern that day where the video and artwork were shot. I remember tearing up between takes to myself watching the sun set over the hills and thinking about the version of me a few years ago writing that song alone in my room. Compared to a few years on, surrounded by new people in my life I’d met since, who I really love and were all there to help me make that vision come to life. It was emotional. I think I’m always going to cherish that day and the people who were there. Each of those people have felt like steps in themselves to me.”